Do the Urkel?

In 1989 the world was introduced to a little show called, Family Matters, and I was introduced to my first hardcore-television crush. His name was Jaleel White, but the world knew him as Steve Urkel. I knew him as, the love of my life.

Like most television series that are past their prime (and about to die), the writers and producers took the show into nonsensical, sci-fi wacky land. In the 7th season, Steve Urkel creates a "cool" machine that magically created his more attractive alter ego, Stefan Urquelle.

I loved Stefan. I wanted to, like, totally marry him. I wanted to do the Urkel, if you know what I mean. He was suave, cool and in control. There was even an episode where the love of my life used a New Edition concert to woo his crack-whore of a love interest, Laura Winslow.

Notice how he moves. The low, thrust, squat-walk. How could I resist?



Yes, I'm embarrassed by the fact that I watched Family Matters as late as 1997. I'm also embarrassed by the fact that I found Steve/Stefan attractive. But I feel that in an effort to move forward, and get over Jaleel, I have to accept the fact that I indeed loved...and lost.

R.I.P. Stefan Urquelle.